Three weeks ago at Awakening (my college group), Ryan (our pastor), asked us a very convicting question:
Who are you becoming?
Not, who are you now or who would you like to be, simply, who are you becoming?
He then went on to say,
"Who you are becoming is determined by who/what you are following."
At first I didn't really get what he was getting at. By Wednesday it clicked.
We as humans are natural followers.We follow ideas, celebrities, trends, emotions, the list goes on.
We follow our friends on Twitter, we follow groups on Facebook, we follow blogs.
So what? What does that have to do with anything?
I believe the reason we follow people, is the same reason we create things for people to follow.
I am not one to bash social networking. I myself have a Twitter, Facebook, and blog and I personally don't consider any three of the above to be 'bad' or 'good'. It depends I suppose, upon how we decide to use them. However, as I asked myself what Ryan was getting at I realized how much time I've spent 'following' different people, thoughts, and yes a few god-awful trends here and there. And then I got to thinking, why? Ahh yes another wonderful life thought for Kelci to ponder.... "Why do we follow and/or create these accounts for people to 'follow'?"
So in efforts to answer the question, I grounded myself from Facebook for 10 days.
I deleted the app on my iPhone and refrained from logging on for what seemed like an eternity.
My excuse for Facebook has always been,
"I live out of state and it's a great way to keep in touch with my friends."
Well, being grounded I realized several things.
1. The people worth "keeping in touch with" will still communicate with you, Facebook or not.
2. Real relationships take real effort. Sure I "like" your status about that great burger you just ate, but how much effort is the click of a button? Does it truly replace the actual effort of a personal message, a text, a phone call, or a hug? What kind of gesture is a 'poke' anyway?
3. The time you spend in front of your computer can easily and more enjoyably be spent interacting with real people instead of a screen.
My next big question, WHY?
People create these accounts to be heard. To feel significant. To 'keep in touch' and reconnect.
Does anyone really care that I just took the best nap of my life?
Do I really HAVE to know the second the next big sale is for my favorite store?
Is it really that important to know what Klohe and Kim Kardashian are doing right now?
No. No. And NO.
Who are we becoming?
A society that relies on instant updates and news feeds for our sense of belonging?
The more I thought about this, the more I realized how guilty I am myself, the more this began to bother me.
Create all the networks in the world and nothing will ever truly replace real human interaction.
That's what this is really about. The natural craving we all have to belong to something.
Facebook has given us the ability to do so at no cost, but lose yourself behind the screen and your losing so much more than you may realize.
The question: "Who am I becoming?" is obviously so much bigger than this, but this is the first of many layers to the real answer. This is the first of many blogs for my new series on "Becoming".
This week, it's more about the second question than the first.
To find out who you are becoming, you must first look to who/what you are following and ask yourself, why?
Ask yourself how important those thoughts/ideas/people really are?
Ask yourself if who/what you're following aligns with who/what you want to become?
If the answer is no, may I suggest grounding yourself from the things which inhibit your sense of clarity and taking 10 days to yourself. Reach out to people (stop poking them), read a good book, go on a walk and really think about who you are becoming and what that means. Not only for yourself, but for your family, your goals, and yes, our society. Your answer may have nothing to do with Facebook, maybe you follow Oprah or your favorite sports team. And please hear me when I say that none of the above are evil, wrong or bad things.
All I'm saying is put down the iPhone and turn off the TV long enough to at least think about it.
Kelci
